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Snow and Rain

Monday, January 17, 2011

It’s one of those good  news — bad news kind of days. On the kidney stone activity, we’re going to wait a week and a day before the procedure to remove it. This is primarily because I’m not doubled over in pain at the moment, so we’re giving it a little more time to pass. I’m pretty happy about waiting because it gives the herbal concoction I’m taking a bit of time to work. The bad news is that we have to use the more invasive rather than the less invasive procedure to break up the stone because it doesn’t show up on an X-ray, and an X-ray is needed to guide the treatment. (I wish that meant I already passed it, but I had the X-ray while I was still agonizing.)

While that pain has diminished, the Lyme disease symptoms are getting worse. My finger joints hurt like crazy (thus the short post) and my hips and knees and toes are in more pain each hour. I remind myself that although this is very uncomfortable, the most effective way to use the coil is to let the Lyme bacteria get active before I zap them. The weather is cooperating on this front. Just before it rains or snows, I tend to feel my worst. Now we’re expecting both.

Last night, I was on the phone with a friend who said I was the most cheerful chronically ill person she’d ever met. (She knew me before I got sick.) I laughed to imagine what anyone reading this blog would think of her opinion. The funny thing is that when I am really bad off, I don’t want to talk to anyone. But as soon as my physical discomfort is manageable, I’m happy to be talking to or seeing people I care about. So I immediately cheer up after 2 or 3 minutes on the phone. Meanwhile, I’ve committed to writing every day (barring the kind of pain I was in on Friday), so all the ugly, painful, mournful feelings show up here. Despite the setbacks and the words of despair, I’m hopeful about where I’m headed.

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