There is a phenomenon that I’ve experienced over and over since I’ve been sick. I call it waking up, but it usually happens when I’m already literally awake.
It goes like this: I have a number of consecutive days (somewhere between 3 and 50) where my symptoms suck up all my attention. My pain level is high. I’m nauseated. My headaches are blinding. My limbs are heavy and tired and uncoordinated. I’m exhausted. I can’t sleep and when I do, I wake up too many times all night. I feel pretty bad. I might not have all the symptoms the whole time, but there just isn’t sufficient relief for enough time for me to get my attention away from suffering.
During those times, I struggle with everything: writing, decision making, cooking, daily self-care, time management. I’m short-tempered and easily frustrated. I’m not interested in doing anything. I can’t concentrate. And I feel pressured to try to catch up with my life.
Then it starts to lift. Sometimes there is something to push it over the edge, like an acupuncture treatment, a yoga class or a world-class nap. I feel a little better. The symptoms start to subside. Then, suddenly my attention pops into the outside world, in the present. It’s amazing.
Suddenly I’m relaxed, interested in listening to the news, wanting to talk to people, ready to go for a walk or cook. I don’t feel guilty napping or resting. I know that I’ll have enough time to do whatever I need to.
That happened today. This time it was acupuncture that pushed it over the edge. I still have symptoms, joint pain, nausea, fatigue and floaters in my vision, but they aren’t so bad that I can’t think about anything else. After my acupuncture treatment this morning, I was tired. I ate lunch and got nauseated (as I expected), then I tried to take a nap. I rested for a few minutes, then I wanted to make phone calls. It was during those calls that I felt a good mood take over me. Afterwards, I was inspired to go for a walk and cook my dinner.
It wasn’t that I felt perfectly well, but the cloud lifted. I felt like I was waking up again.
At this point and for the next few weeks, I’m maintaining what I’m doing. I may add a little here or there, but at a slow pace. I’m trying to whittle away at the infections but not strike myself down with a big Herx.
- Bartonella, abdomen, 5 minutes; chest, 2 minutes
- Babesia, chest, 5 minutes; liver, 5 minutes; ilium, 1 minute on each side; knees/elbows, 1 minute
- Candida, abdomen, 10 minutes; chest, 2 minutes; face, 2 minutes
I saw the acupuncturist today. I think she’s moving something to help my liver clear out. I’m not really sure, but my energy moved a bunch, I got tired, then when I woke up feeling way better.
- homeopathic support
- skin brushing
I couldn’t sleep again last night. Plenty of disturbing dreams. Only 3 hours of sleep at a time. Difficulty falling asleep and staying asleep. Lots of sweating and overheating when I was asleep.
I woke up with the usual hand and foot pain, but not quite as bad today. I also had pain in my kidneys for the first hour after I woke up for real.
I was nauseated after each meal or snack I consumed. I had a bit of a headache. Tonight, I have some eye pain. All day I’ve had floaters in my vision. I had a heat rash on my chest (red, itchy, hot).
I have some pain in my upper back and shoulders, in the bones and joints. I also have “appropriate” pain in the muscles in my upper arms, the ones I worked out during yoga class yesterday.
I have urinary hesitation and loose bowels (and have had both for at least 4 days, though I forgot to mention it in previous posts).
And I’m sweating a whole lot. Summer weather is good for detoxing. Sometimes it can get hard to breathe, but I’ve been taking a homeopathic remedy for my lungs and it seems to be helping with the weather.
Categories: healing process