After that very long meditation on Lyme and fertility yesterday, I found myself playing for several hours with my cousin’s two very young children. One is 8 months old, the other is just under 2 years old.
I enjoyed them. I got down on the floor and hung out with them, letting them get used to me since we haven’t seen each other in quite a while. I joined them looking around at my parents’ apartment and later playing with toys. We did lots of hugging and each one spent a bunch of time in my lap and in my arms. At some point, my back gave out, so no more being carrying them, but without pain, I could have held them for much longer.
The older one liked the way I talked to him. I asked him lots of questions about what he liked and what he wanted as he sat in my lap at the table for dessert. He kept saying he wanted to go to the car, which was his way of indicating that he didn’t quite feel safe and comfortable in this strange new place. His parents told him they would go to the car later. While he was in my lap I whispered to him that he was in a good place, with yummy food and people he liked. He looked at me with his big blue eyes and said, “car-car” again, with less emphasis. I told him the same thing again, and that maybe it was nice to sit in my lap and be at the table with his parents and brother and aunt and uncle. I could feel his body relax as he noticed he was okay. With that, he was ready to ask me for grapes.
I can tell in these moments that I would love to be a mother.
I’m continuing with the regimen of Bartonella every other day. Since I coiled for Lyme yesterday (and felt it this morning) I didn’t increase the Bartonella time today.
- Bartonella, abdomen, 3 minutes
- Candida, abdomen, 10 minutes
I ran out of kombucha again. The problem is that I can only buy a few bottles at a time because they expire quickly and the store never has more than 3 or 4 bottles of what I want. Other than that, it was a regular day, starting with a bath and ending with a castor oil pack.
- homeopathic support
- juiced greens
- skin brushing
- detox bath
- castor oil pack on liver
Since I’ve been sick, I’ve hated spring. I always thought it was because the constantly changing weather set off my symptoms. This is the first spring that I’ve understood the life cycle of Lyme bacteria in the context of the tick life cycle. We Lyme bacteria hosts experience flares at this time of the year because the bacteria multiply in the hope that we’ll run into a hungry tick.
That said, rainy, windy days are the worst. I woke up with pain in my spine, partly attributable to a mild Herx from coiling for Lyme yesterday, achy bones, joints and muscles, and a chill throughout my body. I slept very deeply after going to bed late and was very groggy in the morning.
When I got up, I had a vitamin B-12 shot (thanks Mom), then put myself in the tub. The water was hot, hot, hot. I sweated up a storm to match the one outside. I felt a lot better, and much warmer on the inside, when I got out.
I was exhausted, so I lay down for a while. Then I did my best to straighten out the apartment because my old friend from Bronx Science was coming for dinner. I did alright. I even made another dent in the kitchen en route to setting up the juicer.
The rest of the day I’ve had a low grade headache that has been getting worse since 9pm. The aches and pains and fatigue came and went all day. I fought through them to be with the children. Now it’s catching up to me. Early to bed tonight.